Bit #52: The Crowd Isn't Always Right

Little Life Lesson and Bit of Grace 52: Learn to Make Unpopular Choices

You have heard the saying "If you're friends jumped off a bridge, would you?"

There will be tough lessons in life that require you to take stand and make perhaps some unpopular choices and decisions.

That is ok. Following the crowd may be easier, but it doesn't always mean it's right.

By making the RIGHT choice, you can get the crowd to follow you and get those friends off of the bridge!

If you read yesterday's and still singing the song, Lessons in Lyrics which featured "Get Up, Stand Up" by Bob Marley, you will see how this idea also ties in.

Get up, Stand Up. Take a stand.


Try to make life choices that will improve your standing as a person. This may mean making some unpopular decisions sometimes. Always following the crowd because it’s the easy thing to do can lead you into a dead end. Sometimes you have to say ‘No’.

Bit #51: Lessons in Lyrics~Get Up, Stand Up

Little Life Lesson and Bit of Grace 51: Don't Be Afraid to Stand up for what you believe in.

This week's song choice is Bob Marley's "Get Up, STand Up." This is a song that you will have in your head for a long time and probably one that you have been singing for MANY years. Perhaps you have never taken the time to read over the lyrics and think about.

Marley wrote this song to take action against oppression. He grew up in Jamaica and fought to earn respect for his radical Rastafarian religion.

Have a reat day.

Get up, stand up: stand up for your rights!
Get up, stand up: stand up for your rights!
Get up, stand up: stand up for your rights!
Get up, stand up: don't give up the fight!

Preacher man, don't tell me,
Heaven is under the earth.
I know you don't know
What life is really worth.
It's not all that glitters is gold;
'Alf the story has never been told:
So now you see the light, eh!
Stand up for your rights. come on!

Get up, stand up: stand up for your rights!
Get up, stand up: don't give up the fight!
Get up, stand up: stand up for your rights!
Get up, stand up: don't give up the fight!

Most people think,
Great god will come from the skies,
Take away everything
And make everybody feel high.
But if you know what life is worth,
You will look for yours on earth:
And now you see the light,
You stand up for your rights. jah!

Get up, stand up! (jah, jah! )
Stand up for your rights! (oh-hoo! )
Get up, stand up! (get up, stand up! )
Don't give up the fight! (life is your right! )
Get up, stand up! (so we can't give up the fight! )
Stand up for your rights! (lord, lord! )
Get up, stand up! (keep on struggling on! )
Don't give up the fight! (yeah! )

Bit #50 - Finding That Girl - February Goals

It's the first day of February. Much like the first day of a new year, I take the same stance on the first day of a month. I think of it as a clean slate, a fresh start and a new beginning. I heard a quote this week and I don't remember where, but it struck me. It said, "Nobody can go back and change the beginning, but they can always look ahead and plan for the end." It's cliche, and slightly cheesy but I still like it. It's so easy to dwell on a mistake we made in the past that we don't even allow ourselves the opportunity to change it, make up for it and write a whole different ending.

Anyway, 2010 is still fresh - it's not the end - it's just February, and February happens to be my favorite month of the year! I'm going to be super busy this month, too and I couldn't be more excited for what plans the month holds.

February 2nd: The anniversary of 2 of my best friends. And Groundhog day!

February 7th: Superbowl! Go Saints!

February 9th: I'm going to see Jersey Boys at the Orpheum!

February 14th: Valentine's Day - my favorite holiday!

February 20-21st: Nashville!

Evan also has his basketball tournament in February and because the season isn't over we don't know the exact dates yet, but we're very excited!

Since I knew February was going to be such a busy month, I kept my goals small this month. Small, but still goals I'll have to work to achieve.

1. No carbonated beverages all month - This is going to be so difficult for me because one of my vices is Diet Mountain Dew. I love it, I crave it and I don't know how I'm going to go without it. But, I'm going to do it. Hopefully I will be able to almost eliminate them from my diet forever!

2. No "out to eat" meals all month - With the exception of my Nashville trip, of course. I want to be more responsible with not only my diet, but my money. Constantly eating out or ordering take-out is a waste of money, it's an expense I need to cut out. So, I'm going for it.

3. Stick to my daily workouts - I'm serious here. I'm starting a new routine today, one that I'll talk a little bit more about on Weight Watchers Wednesday on my blog and I'm very excited about it!

So, what are your goals for February? Please share!

Bit #49 - Finding That Girl - January Progress Report

First of all, I want to thank you all for the comments and emails from last week's post. Y'all are so sweet and your words were so encouraging.

So it's the last Monday in January and so it's time to report my status on my January resolutions to you.

If you will remember for 2010 I decided to not give myself yearly resolutions, rather monthly goals that allows myself to reach my ultimate goals more efficiently and with less stressful expectations.

Here's what I set out to do for January:

1. Quit my old job and begin new one. Done - check mark here.

2. Begin eating at least 6 servings of fruit per day. I'm up to 4, and I'm satisfied with that.

3. Begin walking 3 miles daily. I didn't meet this goal, so I'm adding it to February's list.

4. Begin to write my business plan. Done! Still waiting to share it with y'all, but it's done!

5. Write at least 5 snail mail letters per week. I've averaged out at 3 letters per week.

All in all, I'm ok with what I've done. Yes, I would have liked to accomplish everything on the list, but realistically I was adjusting to a new job and I've been so busy from that I've met myself coming and going.

I'll be back next week with February's goals! February is going to be such a busy month for me, but I'm excited for what it has to offer?

How are y'all doing on your resolutions/goals?

Bit #48: Find Yourself Helpless with Laughter

Little Life Lesson and Bit of Grace 48: Find Yourself Helpless with Laughter at Least Once a Day

We have discussed this before, but as life gets harder and throws more curve balls in to our daily routines and life outlooks, we must turn to laughter.

"Laughter is an instant vacation." ~Milton Berle

Laughter really is the best medicine.

If you can't laugh, you have nothing left to give.

At least once, even if only for a brief fleeing moment, find yourself helpless with laughter. I mean belly-aching, tear inducing, drink almost spewing, snorting laughter.

Laugh at anything: laugh at a sitcom, laugh at a distant memory, laugh at yourself, laugh at an embarassing moment you had, laugh at a fictional scenario you played out in your mind after seeing the clumsy and slightly bizarre man in Starbucks, or a joke you heard last week.

You don't need an audience to laugh with, but call your best friend, sister, or mom if you feel you need one.

That brief moment may be the only highlight of the day, but it can be that instant vacation that takes you away from whatever is stressing, difficult, or just plain agonizing.

JUST LAUGH!

"A good, real, unrestrained, hearty laugh is a sort of glorified internal massage, performed rapidly and automatically. It manipulates and revitalizes corners and unexplored crannies of the system that are unresponsive to most other exercise methods." ~Author unknown, from an editorial in New York Tribune

Bit #47: Finding That Girl~Who Said Choosing a Life Path Would Be Easy?

Little Life Lesson and Bit of Grace 47: Finding That Girl~Choosing a Path Ain't Easy

"Understand that the right to choose your own path is a sacred privilege. Use it. Dwell in possibility." ~Oprah Winfrey

{Editor's Note: Finding the right path in life is tough. It is something that everyone struggles with and even after you make the "choice," you will always wonder. We all have MANY talents and interests and combining what we want to do the MOST with something that will make us money to survive, and something we will enjoy doing for the rest of our lives is tough. Thank you Whitney for your honest thoughts on this process.}

Do you have any idea how I spent my Saturday morning?

If you answered picking out china patterns for my upcoming wedding, well....you would be wrong.
If you answered filling out my baby registry at Target, wrong again.

If you answered holed up in Starbucks thinking about life......ding ding ding ding ding! You win the prize. Except there's not really a prize, but you do get to read this post. Don't all jump up and down at once; please try to control your excitement.

It seems strange, even though it happened to me, to think that at 26 I'm still trying to decide what to be when I grow up. Sure, I've been the career girl. I made my way up the retail ladder faster than you can say "80% mark up." I've been involved with just about every aspect of that particular business - and I was forced to walk away. I don't tell people this story very often because I have a problem appearing weak, but this is an honest blog and I'm a honest person and I want you to have the full story before you begin to judge me:). In January 2008 I got very sick. I, at first, thought nothing of it - I was coming off Christmas and a particularly difficult inventory and I just figured I needed a couple days off. Then came the Friday that I couldn't even get out of bed. I could barely lift my head off the pillow. I was in bad shape. I went to the doctor and to make a long story short I was suffering from severe exhaustion, I needed gall bladder surgery and my tumor had grown to almost twice it's previous size because of all the stress I was subjecting my body to, what with working 90 hours a week and all. My doctor strongly advised me to find a new line of work. At first I thought it was insane; my job was my life and it was all I knew how to do. Then he explained that it was like a slow form of suicide for me and so I had to make a decision. Long story short - I walked away. Sure, I was making good money. Sure, I was on the fast track to a corner office in the corporate headquarters of a certain national retailer. But I also had no life outside the store, no time to call my own. I saw my family maybe once every two weeks, my friends even less than that and my apartment walls were the only thing I had to talk to when I got home from the store at 1am. Well, and then there was the whole "slow form of suicide" thing.

This is not a self-loathing post, trust me. I have a point.

So, ever since I walked away I have been thinking seriously about what I wanted to do the rest of my life. I didn't finish college because my chosen career path didn't require one; I had no back up plan because I had no intention of ever leaving retail. Well, I knew I would leave eventually - when I died, most specifically, but nevertheless I had no real idea of what to do. I took the first job I could get my hands on - office and account management and I was good at it, I liked it. But the company I worked for was a small, family owned business where the owner was corrupt and the economy took it by storm. So, I jumped a sinking ship and now I'm a nanny.

It's not that I don't like my job, because I do, but for a few months now(even before the nanny job came along) I've been feeling strange. I don't feel right; I don't feel settled.Back in October, I made the decision to go back to school to be a teacher and I still think I could do that and like it, but what if that's not really what I want to do? What if I want to start my own business? That has always been in the back of my mind. What if I just continue to be a nanny until the children are in college and are looking at me wondering why I'm folding their clothes and making them macaroni and cheese in their dorm room at college?

This brings me back to Starbucks. So, I'm sitting here thinking about my life, contemplating my options when people from both the scenarios I mentioned above walk in the door. One couple had just come from Macy's and they were having a playful argument about the china pattern they had picked out. I listened, amused and jealous all at the same time. A short while later another couple, this time an expectant one and one of their mothers came in and their conversation allowed me to learn that they were headed to Target to register for the upcoming bundle of joy that was about to enter their family. The mother, I presumed the wife's mother, was asserting her opinion much to the chagrin of the husband and once again those feelings of amusement and jealousy collided inside of me.

It forced me to recognize something that I've known deep down for a long time. My feelings of being unsettled and unhappy stem from one thing. My inability to decide what I want to be "when I grow up" come from a place of, in actuality, being perfectly clear with what I want. What I've always wanted to be, more than anything in the entire world, is a wife and mother. And I'm not, in fact, I'm not even close to either of those things. And I would be lying to you if I said that it didn't make me sad, because it does - more sad than anything in my life has ever made me feel. I'm terrified that it will never happen, the one thing I feel called to do might never come to fruition. And it scares the crap out of me. It scares me to say it aloud, to type it in this post, for you to read it.....absolute terror. For so long I lied to myself and to everyone else about it. I was the career girl, I didn't need a husband or children because I was married to my job and the clothes, accessories and home goods were my children. Yeah freaking right. It was all a lie and now that I have no career to be passionate about the facade is all stripped away.

And you know what? I still have to live a life. I still have to be a good person, honorable and pleasing to God. I still have to get up each morning and do whatever it is that I'm doing - and well - because otherwise what kind of a person am I? What kind of person did my parents raise?

For a long time I was angry about walking away from my job. I was pissed(to put it bluntly) that I was, in essence, forced to give up something that I loved. But you know what? I don't feel that way anymore. Because I was in a state of denial, and as much as I love that little town of oblivion it's never good to become a permanent resident. I knew way back then what I really wanted and I was supressing my feelings of inadequecy over not being a wife and mother. And had I not quit retail I would still be in that place, probably worse off than before.

I still don't know what I'm supposed to do with my life without a husband or children, shockingly it's not revealed to you immediately after crossing the border outside the state of denial, but maybe that's what this new year is for - to show me what it is that I'm supposed to be doing. Or maybe not, maybe it's next year. Or the year after that. (Although I hope it's sooner.)

And I'm not going to lie to you, I know it isn't going to be all flowers and rainbows trying to make these kind of discoveries, but at least I'm not living in denial anymore. At least now I'm not lying or pretending to be something I'm not. I'll just say it - I'm a 26 year old single girl working in a dead end job and living in her old room at her parent's house. And you know what? That's just fine for now. And you know why I have to make it fine? Because that's where I am right now. Whether I like it or not that's the place in my life that I've come to at this point and I know that one day I'll understand why everything happened the way that it did and I'll even be grateful for the turns my life has taken. But right now? I'm just going to take it one step at a time.

45 Life Lessons You Won't Learn in School: Part II

Thanks again to the editorial on Smaknews.com for this. Here is the second installment of this fabulous life list.

24. The most important sex organ is the brain.

25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.

26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words ''In five years, will this matter?"

.27. Always choose life.

28. Forgive everyone everything.

29. What other people think of you is none of your business.

30. Time heals almost everything. Give time, time.

31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

32. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

33. Believe in miracles.

34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.

35. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.

36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.

37. Your children get only one childhood.

38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.

39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.

40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.

41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.

42. The best is yet to come.

43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.

44. Yield.

45. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.

45 Life Lessons You Won't Learn in School: Part I

Thanks to this editorial on Smaknews.com for sharing this!

These are great life lessons and snippets for us all to remember!

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.

2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.

3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.

4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch.

5. Pay off your credit cards every month.

6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.
8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.

9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.

10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.

11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.

12.. It's OK to let your children see you cry.

13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.

15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.

16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.

17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.

18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.

19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.

20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.

21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.

23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.

Part II coming tomorrow! Have a great day!

Bit #45: Finding that Girl~Set Monthly Goals

Little Life Lesson and Bit of Grace 45: Instead of Yearly Resolutions, set monthly goals or resolutions

{Editor's Note: Happy 2010 again! Welcome back to Whitney and her weekly, Finding that Girl piece. I love this entry and think this idea is perfect. It not only will help us be more accountable, it will also encourage us to reach those goals. Let's kick our new year off to a great start.}

Here we are on the 11th day of 2010.

How do you say this year, by the way?

Do you say "Twenty ten" or "Two thousand ten" or something else?

Me? I go back and forth.

The one thing I can't stand to hear people say is "oh 10." You know, like '09 or '08? It does not have a zero in front of it, people!!!!







Anyway, it's too early in the year for me to start complaining about petty things. I'll save that til at least February.



Do you make resolutions? Some people don't. Then, there are the people who make "goals" because they don't like the word resolution. Personally, I think the "goals" that you make in January are just resolutions without the champagne hangover. Either way, I think it's good to have something to set yourself up for each year. I've never liked to call mine resolutions, personally but I've always made a list of things I'd like to do for the year.

One problem I've always had, though and something I've noticed that I've now changed this year is that I make unrealistic expectations for myself. I set goals that I know are too difficult to achieve in a specified timeframe and then when I don't achieve them I go into a depression-like funk that is never fun to try and pull myself out of. I've always been this way and I do it in more areas than just goals. I place unrealistic expectations on everything and then when I'm disappointed, I wonder why.

So, yes at the beginning of this year - just like any other year - I set goals for myself. But in a different way. First, I began by looking back on 2009. I looked at what I thought I did good during the year and what I thought I could improve upon. Then, I made a decision. I decided that I wasn't going to make yearly goals for myself, rather I would make monthly ones that were much more attainable. I'll share those goals with you every month and let you know where I stand on the previous challenges I set for myself. I believe this way, I'll keep better track on what it is that I've set out to do and my shortcomings will be more fresh in my mind so I can make better judgments on where I went wrong and what I can change to achieve the goal in the next month. Because let's face it - a year is a long time and no matter how disappointing or hurtful something is the details of the situation can become fuzzy over time and cloud our judgment when assessing our year on January 1st when it's time to make our goals.

So here's January:

1. Quit old job and start new one. (Technically I took care of the quitting part on 12/31/09, so it can be crossed off.)

2. Start the habit eating 6 servings of fruit a day.

3. Walk 3 miles daily without stopping. (Soon the walking will progress to running!!!)

4. Begin writing my business plan. (More on this later! So exciting!)

5. Write at least 5 snail mail letters a week.

I'm already off to a good start. I began the year with a completely new job, a new haircut(bangs included), some new clothes and most importantly a new outlook on life. 2010 (however you say it) is going to be a fantastic year. I can feel it, I can see it and I'm so excited to see what this year has to offer me and all of you!

What did you resolve to do in 2010?

Bit #44: Don't give up

Little Life Lesson and Bit of Grace 44: Even if you start to fail, but really want something, don't give up.

"Just keep swimming, just keep swimming..." ~Dory, Finding Nemo

This idea has particular meaning to me and to Good Will Grace.

You see, we love this concept and this idea. It is refreshing and is a great way to send bits of goodwill and grace in this crazy world.

Whitney, who writes our "Finding that Girl" piece is just phenomenal and has such wonderful ideas and her posts are always intriguing and funny. She is such a wonderful asset to us.

Life in this crazy world gets busy and sometimes this wonderful community of Good Will Grace has gone on the "backburner."

We apologize and vow that this year, this will not happen.

We want this community to grow and become a part of everyone's daily blog read.

If you have an ideas or suggestions for topics or "bits" or you would like to guest post with your take on little life lessons, we would love to hear from you. Email us at goodwillgrace@gmail.com

In this new year, it is a great way to renew that commitment and look forward to all that 2010 has to offer.

Happy, Happy New Year!

Bit #43: Be Mindful

Little Life Lesson and Bit of Grace 43: Be Mindful

The older I get and now especially that I have children, I am constantly aware of other's actions and words that are around me. I worry about what my children will be exposed to in public. I work hard to set a good example for my children and I want to teach them the appropriate ways to handle things and behave. I also want to cocoon them from ideas, words, and actions that they are much to young to explore and see.

I am amazed at how people give NO thought to who might be around when in public. Words are used, screamed, and continually repeated with younger ears around as well as certain actions or ideas that my children are being exposed to and I really have no control over.

So, obviously the crude behavior is not appropriate, but also be mindful of ideas that you are exposing and passing on to younger ones in your life.

A good friend and I had a long email chat one day about her niece. Her niece's mother is always talking about how fat she is, etc. and now this precious little girl is saying that she is fat too.

The Golden Rule comes to mind here: Treat others as you would want to be treated.

By being mindful of others, you are treating others with respect.

Think before you speak and act.

Bit #42: Don't be THAT gal or guy

Little Life Lesson and Bit of Grace 42: Watch how you behave

You know exactly what I was talking about from the title. We have all seen THAT girl or guy at an event, party or other social gathering. People are always watching.

I am not talking about THAT girl Whitney who pops over here every Monday. Feel free to be her everyday.

'Tis the season for holiday parties for work, neighborhoods, church, or other social groups and there will inevitably be THAT person that drinks too much and does really silly and embarassing things (or atleast embarassing the next day)...Don't be that PERSON!

To answer your question-yes, everyone will talk about you and make jokes behind your back. No, everyone was not doing the same things.

These parties that don't just include your intimate social circle are meant to be fun and festive, but there is a very deep "line" that you are not to cross. If you are thinking "ooooh, just one more." Chances are that is a good sign to stop.

This being THAT person doesn't just include drinking, although most of the ridiculous behavior will stem from the drinking. Don't start gossiping with people that you don't really know. You never know how people are related or intertwined and the first impression that someone has of you shouldn't be that all you do is talk about other people.

Everyone can picture Elaine from Seinfeld dancing and giggle at the thought of it. If God didn't grace you with a really good set of feet, keep it simple and SUBDUED on the dance floor at the soiree.

Those tales being told at the watercooler the next day-you don't want them to be about you. :)

Bit #41: Lessons in Lyrics~"You Change your passion for glory"

Little Life Lesson and Bit of Grace 41: Go the distance!

You will certainly have this song and beat in your head for days and most will be able to picture Rocky III.

Reading the lyrics really makes you see the motivational lyrics.

"Eye of the Tiger"

Risin' up, back on the street
Did my time, took my chances
Went the distance, now I'm back on my feet
Just a man and his will to survive

So many times, it happens too fast
You change your passion for glory
Don't lose your grip on the dreams of the past
You must fight just to keep them alive

Chorus: It's the eye of the tiger, it's the cream of the fight
Risin' up to the challenge of our rival
And the last known survivor stalks his prey in the night
And he's watchin' us all in the eye of the tiger

Face to face, out in the heat
Hangin' tough, stayin' hungry
They stack the odds 'til we take to the street
For we kill with the skill to survive chorus
Risin' up, straight to the top
Have the guts, got the glory
Went the distance, now I'm not gonna stop
Just a man and his will to survive chorus T

he eye of the tiger (repeats out)...

Bit #40: Finding that Girl~Anyone can Pay It Forward

Little Life Lesson and Bit of Grace 40: Paying it forward can be fun!

{Editor's Note: As usual, "Finding That Girl" has provided us with an inspiring and enlightening post. This is a wonderful idea and just shows that there are so many ways for us to "Pay It Forward" and it can be fun too. What will you do this week?}

This week I want to tell you a story about someone else paying it forward. It's such a good story and I feel honored just to know it to be able to pass it along to you.

When I was little, like in elementary and middle school, your birthday party was everything. I mean like your social standing rested on how well your birthday party went. Sometimes, the fact that I always had absolutely amazing beithday parties was the only thing keeping me from being a total outcast back in the elementary school days.

My brother is in 7th grade and he goes to a very small private school here in Memphis. They only have one class per grade and so the kids have grown up together and are all pretty close. That's why we were a little surprised a couple of years ago when some of the kids started having birthday parties and not inviting certain people. It was like a guessing game to see who would be on these newly exclusive guest lists. Of course there was always the girl who wanted just a girly sleepover party and the boys who wanted to play full contact laser tag, which was a no brainer as to why some people were left off those guest lists. This year - this past weekend to be exact - a girl in his class had the most exclusive birthday party to date. Only 10 kids were invited and they were handpicked by the birthday girl herself. The only instruction was to show up at the Wolfchase Mall at 2pm on Saturday.. To say that I was intrigued was an understatement.

The party turned out to be called "Shopper's Challenenge" and each child received an envelope with instructions on what kind of outfit to select and $25. Then came the kicker - these outfits were going to be donated to underprivileged children as part of their Christmas gifts! I was completely taken aback that a 7th grade girl would choose this for her party! This is literally all they did - shop and eat a cakie in the mall food court. And that's what she wanted. Talk about paying it forward - this little girl has got me beat by at least a mile! I still can't get over such a selfless act of giving at what is supposed to be all about you - a birthday party! It sure makes me feel selfish for all the years I made mine all about me. But maybe next year I'll take my cue from one of Evan's classmates and pay it forward a little bit to some who have little when I am receiving so much.

Love, Whitney

Bit #39: Put Thought in to the Gifts You Give

Little Life Lesson and Bit of Grace #39: Put thought in to the gifts you give!


We ALL have received the "bad" and completely random gift. As the holidays approach, I thought we could take this opportunity to talk about gifts.

Have you gotten the air mattress and coordinating manual air pump, sunflower button shirt (I am not even kidding), meat dehydrator, article of clothing that was so hideous, the dog hid and was also 2 sizes to big/small, socks, etc.? I'm sure we could compile our gifts and create an emporium of those "bad" gifts.

The older I get, the more I cherish gifts that is obvious that the giver put a lot of thought and effort in. It is not at all about the cost or size of the gift, but the thought.

I LOVE when I find something for someone that is perfect. They immediately pop in to my head when I see it or sometimes before a birthday or the holidays I will start thinking about what would be perfect for that special person.

We all have gifts, talents, hobbies, and awesome personalities and even the most hard to buy for person has thoughtful gifts waiting for them. So put your "thinking caps" on this holiday season.

Bit #39: Finding That Girl~You Never Know When the Goodwill will hit you

Little Life Lesson and Bit of Grace 39: You never know when the mood will strike you to do good!

"Blessed are those who can give without remembering, and take without forgetting." ~Princess Elizabeth, Asquith Bibesco

{Editor's Note: Yay for Whitney! Last week she challenged us to pay it forward once a week during the holiday season. Bravo for her pay it forward deed. I did mine too.}

This week I had an epiphany in the clearance racks at Hollister.Did y'all know it's Christmastime?

Well, I went to the mall Saturday and it was just beautiful and everyone was so polite and nobody flipped anyone off or cursed anyone out and nobody stole any parking spaces and I just felt like I was right in the middle of a Thomas Kincaide painting.

Except for not.

It was the craziest thing I've ever seen - and I've worked in retail at Christmastime y'all. There's almost nothing I haven't seen - all in the name of getting a cashmere sweater at 50% off. (By the way I love cashmere, and there's a cashmere sweater on my Christmas list if y'all wanted to get me something. Just saying.)

Anyway, back to my epiphany.

So, I was in Hollisters and I generally hate this store because it's all kinds of loud and the associates are all approximately a size 00 and 16 years old and they all look at me like I'm a walking member of the viral plague entering into their store, but I was on a mission to find some jeans for my sister and I had it under good authority that they had some on clearance. So I walk into the store and make my way to the clearance section and I'm seriously about to faint from the close proximity that I have to every other shopper in the tristate area as they are ALL in the store with me at that very minute, when I all but snapped the head off the sales clerk who couldn't answer my questions and also appeared more ambivalent about her job by the second.

That's when it hit me.

My epiphany, I mean.

All week I've been worried about trying to get done Christmas shopping and stressing over finding everyone the perfect gifts that they'll just love and talk about for years that I neglected something. Remember my post from last week? Yeah, I believe I set out a challenge and then totally ignored it myself. I hadn't done a single shred of anything for anyone else all week long. Go me.

Anyway, I realized that while this girl may not have had more than a leaf of lettuce for lunch she was most likely doing the best that she could during what was probably her first experience working a holiday season in retail. So, I walked my butt out of the store and up to Chik Fil A where I purchased a few $5 gift cards. I pulled out a notecard and envelope from the stash in my purse, inserted the gift cards and a little note wishing a Merry Christmas, and took it back to Hollister. I handed it to a very bewildered looking young man behind the cashier's stand and walked out. My hope is that the employees were able to use these gift cards to relax a little bit on break, because it's stressful to do what they do at any time of the year - much less Christmastime. It wasn't a huge gesture, but hopefully it's something that made a small difference to their workday and holiday season.

Did you have the opportunity to pay it forward this week?

Love,

Whitney

Bit #38: Lessons in Lyrics~Wonderful Time of Year

Little Life Lesson and Bit of Grace 38: Take time to enjoy this most wonderful time of year

This song resonates in our head each year. It is a lovely song that always makes me smile and sing/hum for days.

The song was written in 1963 and originally performed by Andy Williams. I hope you all take some time this holiday season to reflect on the joy that we all have in our lives.

What makes this time wonderful for you may not be the parties for hosting, marshmallows for roasting, or the mistletoeing, but I do hope your "hearts will be glowing" as you are surrounded by people and things you love. We all do have so many things to be thankful for and this time of year, although hectic and crazy is a wonderful reminder that life is good.

Enjoy singing and humming this song all day long. :)

"It's the Most Wonderful Time of Year"

It's the most wonderful time of the year

With the kids jingle belling

And everyone telling you

"Be of good cheer"

It's the most wonderful time of the year

It's the hap-happiest season of all

With those holiday greetings and gay happy meetings

When friends come to call

It's the hap- happiest season of all

There'll be parties for hosting

Marshmallows for toasting

And caroling out in the snow

There'll be scary ghost stories

And tales of the glories of Christmases long, long ago

It's the most wonderful time of the year

There'll be much mistltoeing

And hearts will be glowing

When love ones are near

It's the most wonderful time of the year

There'll be parties for hosting

Marshmallows for toasting

And caroling out in the snow

There'll be scary ghost stories

And tales of the glories of Christmases long, long ago

It's the most wonderful time of the year

There'll be much mistltoeing

And hearts will be glowing

When love ones are near

It's the most wonderful time

It's the most wonderful time

It's the most wonderful time

It's the most wonderful time of the year

Bit #37:Finding That Girl~Pay It Forward

Little Life Lesson and Bit of Grace 37: It's all about giving and we all have a helping hand to lend

"Life is a gift, and it offers us the privilege, opportunity, and responsibility to give something back by becoming more. " ~Anthony Robbins

{Editor's Note: I love this week's Finding that Girl post and will definitely follow Whitney in this quest and pay it forward as much as I can this season. We ALL can do something. I also will add the minis in the mix. My son is just starting to "get it" in terms of giving back and learning what this holiday season is all about. Thanks Whitney for challenging all of us!}

I've been decorating for Christmas all weekend, listening to Christmas music and just generally getting in the holiday spirit.

I've had my first official "Christmas" Starbucks in the red cup, seen mothers fighting over the last "My LifeSize Doll" in the WalMart toy aisle and waited in a checkout line longer than the number that represents the federal deficit.

The official holiday season has begun, y'all.

Last night while I was going to sleep I was thinking about last Christmas and I remember one post from a blogger that really stood out to me. I had just found Gwen's blog and this was one of the first posts I had read, but it had such an impact on me.

This is what the holiday season should be about - giving. Even if it's something small, no matter how much it makes a huge difference.

So, I'm going to make a pledge and a challenge.

My pledge is that at least once a week, I'm going to pay it forward to someone. It could be someone in line behind me at Starbucks, my struggling co-worker, a fellow blogger - I won't know until the moment strikes me.

My challenge is to have you join me. Once a week, give to someone who least expects it. And make it a spur of the moment decision. Sure, it will make you feel good but I guarentee you it will make the recipient feel even better.

And little by little, that will make for a better holiday season for everyone!

Oh, and let me be the first to wish you Merry Christmas!

Love,

Whitney

"If you can't feed 100 men, just feed one." ~Mother Teresa

Bit #36: Use Your Imagination

Little Life Lesson and Bit of Grace 36: Don't Leave your Imagination at Home

I stumbled upon this piece by Ellen Phillips in a book entitled 50 Things that Really Matter. We always emphasize on the use of imagination in children, but sometimes I can get lost in my imagination and daydreaming like thoughts.

Dr. Seuss is a classic and wonderful example of someone who used his imagination in his work and sparked a love for reading and imaginative thoughts in children.

Here is the excerpt from Ellen Phillips:

"But Imagination for each of us is about more than physically seeing-it's also about 'seeing' connections between seemingly unconnected things. We may pick up the colors of a favorite scene in the yarns of a sweeater or scarf. (And the peaceful, repetitive nature of knitting is ideal for freeing our minds to imagine other things, too-like an attractive arrangement for next summer's garden or a new recipe for cookies.)

Ultimately, whatever way we use our imagination, we are telling a story. And the more unusual connections we see, the richer and more interesting our creations-our stories will be."

Happy Weekend!

Bit #35: Be Curious

Little Life Lesson and Bit of Grace 35: Keep a Curious Mind

"Curiosity is a gift we each can share. Harvesting it is simple: Just be like a child. Wonder, play, pretend, and live in the moment. Then watch with amazement as the world unfolds around you." ~Kara Messinger

The most famous and smartest people in history that have gone on to achieve great things had a very curious mind!

Albert Einstein-clearly curious to sit around and figure out that E=mc2 and the other "over my head" mathematical business.

Michelangelo-Curious! "Why couldn't you paint the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel? I mean it looks so boring just being white."

Thomas Edison-Thanks for being so curious and inventing the lightbulb

Serget Brin and Larry Page-The Google creators were very curious and thanks to their curiosity for creating the search engine to learn about ANYTHING, they can help fuel our curiosity.

I have a curious child and sometimes it can be exhausting. He must have 1004 questions for a minute detail of a story, movie, why the refrigerator just made that weird noise, or homeless man we passed in the car on the way home from preschool. Even during those times of frustration mixed with exhaustion, I must remember to take a deep breath and see it as an AMAZING mind at work and foster that love for learning and knowing more about how the world works, surroundings, and why things happen.

The list above of famous curious people could go on and on. The moment we stop being curious, the moment we stop learning. So ask questions, think of different perspectives, and look for the hidden beneath the surface answers.

The mind, like the rest of our body needs to be exercised. So, go on...get your curiosity on.

"The important thing is not to stop questioning...Never lose a holy curiosity." ~Albert Einstein